LITTLE GIRL LOST...

We all make mistakes, because those that don't make mistakes never tried anything. This a difficult thing for me to write about because people I love are involved. I met a wonderful woman and fell deeply in love. I forgot, or ignored, all my gender issues, issues I was well aware of but chose to bury so not to embarrass loved ones or myself. I couldn't be a girl because I wasn't born one. I know a lot more today than I did than, but that came from years with psychiatrists, therapists and failed suicide attempts. Real life isn''t as pleasant as your dreams are. I married and had two great kids, a son and a daughter. These three wonderful people would bear the brunt of my disease. It's flippant to say Gender Dysphoria is a disease cured with a dress. Sure a nice dress may help you on the road to recovery, a name change can help make you feel better and a new birth certificate with your girl name and
FEMALE" listed under GENDER on it may send you over the top, but there are people who are badly hurt by your cure. To get a heart transplant someone has to die. My family, my friends, and even the ability to make a living all were critically injured in the wreckage of my cure. Hey I was highly educated, Masters degree in Management from the University of Virginia, a ground breaking thesis on the Community Reinvestment Act predicting a massive real estate bubble, not taken very seriously when I wrote it in 1981. I was a Senior Vice President of one the largest banks in the country, I was part of Senior Management, I had thousands of people who worked for me, I made a lot of money. To say that a dress would cure me is a sick comment in my book . To be sure I wear a dress now and then, even a tight skirt, unfortunately it's as a waitress or hostess that I wear my hard won feminine attire, not as a respected banker. My journey to that dress, that birth certificate, and my new jobs was a difficult one both emotionally and physically. It wound through New Jersey, Colorado, Utah, Virginia, Alabama and Canada. It went through doctors offices, therapist offices, a private island in Canada, and a locked psychiatric floor in Colorado Springs. A long journey that I'll take you on if your interested. This journey includes the Mosad, lost medical licences, conspiracy accusations, state investigations and me. Come on along  (To be continued...)